Ramping up to Christmas

My life is really different than it was a year ago, when I had a job and stability. Yet, despite the nearly-complete lack of money, I'm pretty darn happy.

A year ago I sat in cubicle in a big cement building. My job wasn't miserable, at all! But it wasn't often enjoyable, either. I had some friendly co-workers but they weren't really my friends. I had stability and financial security, but I spent so much time on those things.

Now I'm almost always flat broke. The biggest impact from that is that I'm not meeting child support obligations. Everything else I can get through. Both Heather & Celia are remarried and supported elsewhere ... which doesn't, of course, release me from my obligation in any way. But it affords me the luxury of not getting an utterly miserable job, like when I worked for the auto body shop. That's gotta be the worst job I've ever worked.

But even though I'm broke... I have so much time! Usually I don't utilize much of it, but in the last few weeks I've been able to spend that time beneficially. Between moving myself, moving my sister, Kazum & shows, and work... I've been really busy. It would've been horrible to be this busy with a full-time job. *shudder*

I'm really excited about the Christmas holidays with the boys. I'm planning on lots of D&D. Plus reading to them, and Guitar Hero (Haus got a PS2 for Dana's kids for Christmas). I may also spend a day or two at Jem's place... he'll be super-lonely after Tasha's vacated, and the kids love it there. So do I. He's superb with kids and they dig him, too.

I'm all giddy and a-flutter over Joey. We chat now & then on the phone, and she sends me the most delightful, long emails. She's infatuated with me, just as I am with her. Since we're both broke and confined to our relative remote corners of Oregon, we can't overdose on one another. Instead we pine and jones. When we finally get to see each other we're gonna fuse together at the face, methinks.

I hope that she can come visit for New Year's Eve. I also hope that Kazum will get a gig that I can bring Joey to. She's spectacular arm-candy (not that that's her primary draw) and I want to preen and grin and be obnoxiously pleased with my good fortune. Honestly, I'd be just as happy being locked into a room with her... but a big fun party is cool, too.

I work on Christmas Eve - odd for the gym to be open, but hey, it's hours that I desperately need. I'm hoping that we can get Tasha packed & bustled off in time for me to volunteer at a soup kitchen with Nico & Noah & some other Wanderlust folk. I used to take the boys to the soup kitchen once a month or so, but since losing stability we've not gone for a looooong time.

After volunteering I'll work from 4 to 6, and then hustle over to Emily's place for Christmas Eve dinner. Yay! I'm hoping that Doc will come along, too.

Then it's back to my (Haus's) place. Haus & Dana & the boys are spending Christmas Day with Dana's mom, so I'll have half a day to clean & tidy things to prepare for the boys' arrival. I'm nervous about their extended visit; I'm not really set up for Benjaminions. At the same time I'm excited for it.

I have a gift card for Powell's, but other than that my Christmas funds are less than $5. :( That's kind of okay; Christmas isn't about gifts. But it's really tough 'cause I don't have anything for the boys. :(

I played guitar & sang for Dana's boys last night, and had much fun doing so. I played for Haus & Eric & Dana, too. I love having folk to play for!

Okay, it's almost 2 am. Time to sleep for a few hours before the final long haul to get Tasha off on her long haul. We're all postponing the sad, but soon it has to crash home. :(

Tasha's moving back to Logan

A few days ago my sister and her husband decided it's time to throw in the towel. :(

They were married at the Arboretum, 8 years ago. They moved to Portland about 2 years ago, ending up in the same apartment complex I lived in at the time. I've loved - so much - having them nearby. I spend a lot of time there - playing Rock Band with Jem, playing D&D with Tasha & Jem & Korey, hanging out there with kids, helping clean & do dishes, crashing there now & then. It's my primary home-away-from-home, and I've grown lots closer to my kid sister than I've ever been before. I love her and Jem with all my heart.

They're working together really well to accomplish Tasha's move back to Logan, which happens in 2 days. It's heartbreaking but I'm so glad there isn't hatred and vitriol going on.

I keep switching between sad, lonely misery for Tasha & Jem, to elation over my bright new crush on Joey. I'm really glad that my life is full of so many positives right now, 'cause this is a huge negative that synergizes well with my own broke & nearly-homeless situation.

Tasha's holding it together really well - she really buckles down during a crisis. But she's hanging on by a fingernail and it's breaking my heart. They are going to miss one another so powerfully. :(

White Album Christmas 2009 - second show

The second White Album show went a little better than the first, overall. Miranda & I dropped our Cupie - cursed Cupie! But everything else went well and the show was a success.

Remember a few months ago when Dutch & I stunted with a gorgeous lady named Joey in Kazum panties? Well, Dutch & I (mostly Dutch) have stayed in touch with Joey, and she got herself into town for the show despite huge challenges in doing so. Joey's a single mom who lives about an hour south of Portland. She does techie work with computers and she's been really scrounding for work lately, so she's nearly as broke as I am. She's supermodel-pretty, and she has an adorable 9-year-old son named Sascha whom I've only briefly met.

I got Joey into the show, and she'd brought Dutch and I gifts - homemade Irish Creme Liquor. Yum!

After the show we all meandered to the basement speakeasy - my favorite place in the world to have afterparties! Clover was there, even more anxious to stunt than I was, which is an accomplishment. We ran through our stunt sequences, though it was outside on pavement in the dark and that put a damper on things somewhat. We still did well, though. I can't wait until we move into the harder stuff!

I wasn't sure if Joey was interested in me, but it turns out that she was. Yay! Despite being broke & nearly homeless, the last week has seen me attracting the interest of two of the hottest ladies I've ever had the good fortune to get to know. And they dig me - surely a side-effect of oxygen deprivation from being elevated in stunts.

Anyway, Joey went home with me to Clackamas. I'm not sure what's going to happen in the future - we're both carless and broke. It's fairly pathetic. But we made a strong connection and I'm hoping to spend lots of time with her. I don't want more pretty girls to fall into relationships with... I much prefer a monogamous relationship. Might Joey be such a committed relationship? It's possibly too early to tell, but I sure am holding on to high hopes of spending more time with her when we can make that happen.

So, to summarize my life - I'm mostly unemployed, still moving my stuff out of Mary's basement, working for rent in Clackamas, yet still living a fun-filled life of adventure and excitement surrounded by excellent people I love deeply. I'm gonna seriuosly miss Dutch & Uli & the other Kazumites over the Christmas holidays.

My life is far better than it has any right to be. I'm deeply grateful for that, and especially for the amazing people who are responsible.

White Album Christmas 2009 - first show

We did two routines - Piggies (with seven people!) and Birthday. We were scrambling madly on Birthday up to a few days before the first show on the 12th, but we pulled it off quite well, as we always seem to do. Yay!

I've been doing a lot of after-hours stunting with Dutch, in the last few months. Monday Funday petered out as the weather got rainy, but after Kazum practice we almost always stunt for a few hours. Sarah (Dutch's lady) is a regular. Amanda is a girl Dutch met, and she came & stunted with me and Dutch at the Halloween Howl. She's amazing, and drop-dead gorgeous. But I was dating Mary, so she was super-duper off-limits. Clover is a new girl who just moved up from California, and she's an astounding stunter. She's circus-trained, with ballet background as well as contortionist & hand-balancing skills. Like virtually all of the girls I stunt with, she's smoking-hot, but it's all professional and I'm really excited about working closely with Clover to build some tight & impressive stunt routines.

Anyway, the first White Album show went well. A few timing issues troubled us, and a couple of stunts were wobbly. Dutch was very frustrated about dropping a chair, and Uli's toes got jammed on an airplane during practice. But overall... a very good show.

After the show was a wild afterparty at the Jupiter hotel, across the street from the Bossanova. I ended up spending lots of time with Amanda, and she stole my heart away. She had broken up with her boyfriend a week before, and Mary and I had broken up just hours before (at the show; 'twas a sad event). Amanda was heading back to Santa Cruz in the middle of the week, which left us both well-situated for a rebound fling. So, we had one, and it was amazing. We connected really well and I hope that we can stay friends, and hang out when she comes to visit. I'm trying to prepare myself for her to fade away, though... she's got a full life going on in California. I sure do treasure getting to know her, though. She's amazing.

I spent the next week moving and practicing, taking a mid-week break to spend Amanda's last night in Portland with her. We walked around downtown being an adorably cute new couple. We traipsed through Powell's, wandered through Pioneer Square, and I showed her the downtown accoustic amplification park and the fountain park across from the Keller Auditorium. It was a magical night, without any doubt. We ended up at the hotel where she was spending her last night. Her best friend & best friend's daughter were in the room, though, so we hung out in the empty lower hotel lobby for a few hours. It was really a magical evening.

And then she was gone. :( I am really glad I got to spend two concentrated bursts of time with her before she left, and I hope that we can remain friends despite the distance. I have a huge crush on her, obviously, and she returns the interest. But distance and time are sure to cool that ardor significantly.

A brief recap of the last few months

So, last I wrote it was high summer and we'd just finished OCF.

It was an incredible summer, despite my financial struggles as I looked not-quite-as-earnestly-as-I-should-have for a job. I sure miss having an income, but I really don't miss sitting in a concrete bunker all day in a cell in front of a computer.

I scraped and scrambled and managed to pay rent through August at my apartment in Beaverton, near Tasha & Jem. After OCF I started dating Mary, and we had a fun-filled late summer. Mary has a house near Mount Tabor, with a huge backyard and a gorgeous garden. I spent increasing quantities of time at her place, and finally when I couldn't scrape together rent for September I moved in with her. It was too early, but we were spending almost all of our time together anyway, and things were really really good. We worked out a way for me to meet my rental obligation by working for Mary - doing work in the garden, fixing up things around the house, refinishing furniture, etc.

Mary is amazing. She prepares wonderful food for New Seasons' Demo department, and she makes the most delicious vegetarian dishes in the world. Her parties are amazing and I haven't ever had as much delightful fun as I did last summer with her. We went out the beach a couple of times to stay in beach houses owned by her friends, and those trips were incredible. I fell in love with Mary, her dog Nellie, and her daughter Laurel. It was a spectacular summer.

Kazum has also been going strong. We now have 7 members. Me, Uli and Miranda are the longer-standing members. We've also added Dutch, a 250-lb college football player with the heart of a lamb. He's been working his butt off (pretty literally) and he's become an integral, core member of the group. I love Dutch.

Ari & James also joined us as mid-level flyers and light bases. James is a human muscle with a shaved noggin' and tatted-up shoulders. He's amazing at anything he puts his mind to, from gymnastics or basing to being the best boyfriend Dutch & I have ever seen. He leaves us in awe. We all wanna be like James. Ari has amazing balance and he's light enough that he & Dutch can do virtually anything I can do with the girls.

A few months ago Kazum did a show (at the Bossanova) at which the Yard Dogs Roadshow performed. They're astounding! But more importantly, Kazum met two important people.

Doc came up to us after the show and introduced himself. He's 6' 2", 170 lbs. with a fire-spinning and capoera background. He was interested in learning to do what we do. We were thrilled to teach him! After working like crazy he integrated into the new Piggies routine that we just performed for the last 2 Saturdays. He's recently divorced with a 10-year-old son, and he's just moved to Portland from California. We all love Doc, and he's learned an incredible amount in a very short time.

We also met a beautiful lady named Joey who bought some Kazum panties, so Dutch & I lifted her up in various poses to show them off for the camera.

As the summer faded into autumn I managed to land two teaching positions. The first was for a local downtown performance arts center, where I was supposed to teach gymnastics on Saturday mornings. A few times, students actually showed up! But overall we simply couldn't bring in students, and a few weeks ago we decided to end those classes. I've still not been paid a dime for 2 months of Saturdays spent teaching or waiting to teach. *shrug*

I also landed a job at Rose City Gymnastics Academy, where Melissa used to teach. That's been going really well - I teach adult gymnastics classes once a week, but more importantly I've been filling in for other teachers all the freakin' time. It's not much money despite that, though.

Although the relationship with Mary has been strong and wonderful, overall, my lack of income has been a constant thorn. A few weeks ago Mary and I finally had to acknowledge that it just wasn't working. She has been bothered by my joblessness since I met her, and with good reason. She wants a boyfriend who's self-sufficient and able to meet his obligations, and have enough money remaining to do fun things with her now & then. Who wouldn't want that? And being dependant upon my girlfriend for room & board & food makes things difficult & akward.

So, I've been moving into Haus's new place for a while. He lives with his girlfriend Dana and Dana's four sons who are nearly exactly the age of my younger 4 boys. They love me and I love being there. I work 30 hours a week for room & board, and we're all (so far) quite happy with it all. It's in Clackamas, though, which is lame... even though the new Green MAX line runs there it's still way out in the middle of nowhere.

That catches me up to a few weeks ago, when the White Album Christmas show took place. I'll post a whole new blog for each show, though.